Wholly Bejeebers!!

This next performer has been hiding in the wings here at The Magic Marshtian Tent for quite some time now, but we feel she is ready for her close-up now. Let's have a big round of ironic applause for none other than Katty K. Bejeebers, the on-again, off-again Sleuthette! This classic fence-sitter just can't seem to make up her tiny mind about that poor sweetheart of a man, Chester Weger. We envision her reclining on the couch above, plucking the petals off a daisy while trying to decide his guilt: "He killed them. He killed them not. He killed them..."

A close friend and confidante of Bizzy Bee "Piss Pond" Swirling (see January blog entry titled "Micturation Mama"), Katty was one of the original Sleuthettes way back last year until she seemed to have a change of heart in late November, abandoning the Dorkside for saner pastures.

Katty K. Bejeebers: That (Tepid Starch) there are no words for him or (Chatty CathyDin). They surely outshine Billie, bet she don't like that. Things didn't fall apart when Jackson came on board, they fell apart when (Starch) opened his big stupid, hateful, ignorant mouth. Then (Chatty CathyDin) went totally off the wall, you'd think Aliens took her over night and now she just wonders aimlessly. Poor woman, lets start a fund to get her some help  (Originally posted on Facebook Dec. 15, 2013)

Yes, she appeared to have regained her fragile grip on sanity for a while, but now she is right back over on the SRM group, currently appearing under two different accounts. (Gee, Bitter Billie sure won't like that! Those "fake profiles" don't go over well with Ms. Rubin and her pals.)

Bobby Darin discovers his real "Dream Lover" is a mendacious
elderly woman from LaSalle, Ill., named Katty K. Bejeebers.

Taking the given name of her beloved singing idol, Bobby Darin, Katty Bejeebers is now posting under the name Cassotto Bob. See what she did there? She reversed his first and last names. Isn't she a clever cluck? Too bad she failed to realize the web address on her newly-renamed profile still bears the old name. Not to mention the fact that all of her old posts under the original account name (rhymes with Stammerer) are still out there and although they now show up as "Cassotto Bob," anything she was tagged under leads right back to her.

This sad woman with a major Mother Teresa complex has a soft spot for hard-luck stories and never misses a chance to help the less fortunate, even if it means putting her own life at risk. She has been known to offer free rides to crazy, mooching dipsomaniacs and has invited dangerous sex offenders into her home.

Over the years, Katty has allowed 19 down-on-their-luck lowlifes to take shelter under her roof while they supposedly got their act together. The last one lived it up on her dime like there was no to-Morrow, running up a $300 bill watching pay-per-view porn on her TV. A wanted felon with a rap sheet as long as your arm, this 47-year-old loser is listed as non-compliant on the Illinois sex offender list, but she still let him into her home because it was cold outside and she felt sorry for him!

And then there's her other recent charity case, Bitter Billie Rubin, who turned on her like the rabid, barking-mad dog she is. (Billie likes accusing others of showing their "true colors" when they disagree with the SRM group's wacky theories, but she sure shows hers here!) After Ms. Bejeebers went out of her way to help Billie by giving her rides, helping her find public assistance and obtain herpes cream refills, Billie sends her nasty PMs like this one: I was always onto you. You must have been a very old woman to have hooked up with the likes of Jack Jackson.. so much that you created another facebook to talk to him. Yess I have it all saved.
And yes you do look old. Must be YOUR SOUL talking to U

I wonder if Katty named that knife "Mack"?
Bitter Billie better watch who she calls old!!

But don't let Katty's grandmotherly facade fool you, folks! She may promise you to your face that she will never reveal the closely-held secret you have just entrusted her with, but then she will turn right around and blab it to anyone she chooses. And when caught in her lies, she will plead ignorance, tell you she has no idea how that could have happened and claim that person must have read it somewhere on the Internet.

On the plus side, she did beat the shit out of Coral Biggott when they were kids. LOL And then Coral called her the next day and asked her to go roller skating! Maybe she scrambled the few brains Coral had to begin with. That would explain a lot, wouldn't it? ;-)

Although Ms. Bejeebers admits Chester did rape an 8-year-old girl when he was 12, she still thinks he should be paroled: Iam aware of the 12 yr. old incident and its truth, which the other side will never admit, they would rather accuse the ones stating it and how they got that info illegally and spend weeks on that. 
yes, he did rape her, I don't like saying it, but he did. My brother-in-law remembers them too. Or her I should say. I tried telling the other side, truth is truth, but they just ignored it (Originally posted on Facebook Nov. 29, 2013)

So are we to presume she is back over on "the other side" to continue her truth-spreading mission? Or is Katty K. Bejeebers just another turncoat spy who was shilling for the likes of Chatty CathyDin O'Barrell and Fearless Leader all along? The world may never know since she is about as reliable as a chocolate teapot!

Karmic kitchen-sink of keystrokes on Katty Bejeebers  

Turn-ons: Bobby Darin, Velveeta, knives named Mack, anything containing Bobby Darin's DNA, driving around in her car with dangerous lunatics, dream lovers, escaping her dismal existence by visiting North Carolina, dead singers from the late 1950s-early 1960s

Turn-offs: Keeping her word, having her crops wither on Farmville, copying and pasting, Rome, Ill., good judgment, opening her Verizon bill when she has houseguests, expensive car repairs

Hobbies: Tending her virtual farm, tending to be computer-illiterate, creating bizarre cheesecake flavors like babycakes beef bouillon or avocado aspirin, telling tales out of school, boozing at the Valley Bar & Grill 'long about a Saturday night, obsessing over Bobby Darin, brandishing baseball bats at house parties, bidding for Bobby Darin's belongings on eBay

Katty thinks Bobby Darin is a real doll!

Most revealing quote: my mother called me a Hoodlum, even a Derelict.  (Originally posted on Facebook Dec. 8, 2013)

Most unlawful quote: I tried smoking crack today.  (Originally posted on Facebook Dec. 5, 2013)

Cheesiest quote: I made some velveeta chocolate/walnut fudge and Velveeta peanut butter fudge tonight.... mmm good, that will help for a bit  (Originally posted in Facebook Feb. 26, 2014)

Favorite faux aphorism: The grass is greener but still needs to be mowed.  (Originally posted on Facebook Jan. 22, 2014)

Ms. Bejeebers has previously expressed her admiration for and interest in The Magic Marshtian Tent: I'm assuming not to many from SRM (if any) go to her page to see that. BUT I would bet 1000.00 they ALL check out the circus (Originally posted on Facebook Dec. 1, 2013)
AND
By the way where is that tent?  (Originally posted in Facebook Dec. 15, 2013)

We are right here, Katty K., always ready to oblige when we feel someone has merited their 15 minutes of shame!